Since the pandemic started, the (IOP) Intensive Outpatient Program, has been meeting virtually in zoom format. This past Monday we began meeting in person at the building.
We are starting with half days and already I am tired. It’s my stamina, not the greatest, but, I believe it can be improved upon.
The staff is truly wonderful. They smile and are engaging and give off a wonderful energy. They enliven me I guess you could say.
I took to one woman(staff), in particular because she is about my age and she has shared that she has taken some serious blows in life and there she is standing, beaming, glowing. Nothing is holding her back. Also she is physically fit which is something I’m thinking of getting back into.
I took some blows too and I’m not what I used to be and this woman truly motivates me. I can aspire to be like her. She gives me a reason to get up and get out of bed and show up at program each day.
I was friendly with several people fitting in where I could, meaning my peers.
It’s known to be cliquey and staff is aware of this. It’s surprising to me that the younger sicker patients are giving me the cold shoulder and unfriending me on Facebook. It’s almost like a little hostility or scapegoating.
I was told that the program is a clubhouse model where everyone is wanted, needed, and expected.
Another staff said that the program is a friendly and secure place in a world that can be cruel otherwise.
Rather than working or volunteering I can go to Program. It gets me out of the house. Expectations are not too high.
So now I’m all set with the building I live in and also the Program I go to.
This is where I’ve landed since going out on disability and getting divorced. Although I have some regrets, it’s the life I’ve made for myself and it’s not bad.
As a side note I am working on weight loss on my own. I’ve been working at it several months now and have lost 22 pounds. I want to lose 10-20 more depending. I will have to evaluate as I go. My weight loss is part of my make over.
I am trying to recreate my youth within reason.
Program can be like going to school 😊