Self Respect Is About Standing Up For Yourself

Don’t be afraid to walk away

I’ve been taking risks lately and standing up to people even if it means I might lose them.

I’ve been a perfect victim of abuse because I couldn’t be alone and I didn’t have independent living skills or I was financially dependent.

People disrespect me and I would take it because if I said anything to them that could mean that I would lose them.

Now that I’m becoming really independent, valuing myself, and most importantly I’m tired of hurting and being sick inside I take the chance and speak my mind. Not right away, I give the person several chances to be sure of what I’m seeing.

Sometimes I am wrong. I can misinterpret. But sometimes I’m right and the person just isn’t going to admit it but they end up changing their behavior and becoming more respectful.

That’s totally fine in my book because that’s what I want anyway. It’s not about winning or losing but about being treated better.

I’m not into abusing the other person either. I say it once, maybe twice, if the person continues, I move on from them.

If I don’t speak my mind, it bothers me because I keep accepting disrespect, it festers in me and I become sick inside because I’m betraying myself.

It’s very important how you stand up to the person. It takes a number of skills. It all needs to be right in your mind.

For me, I never want to hurt or lose the person. But if they are hurting me continually I am going to put myself first and take the chance of telling them. They do often deny what they are doing, maybe they don’t see their own behaviors clearly, but, if you mean anything to them, you will see that they will try to be more considerate, or that they are kinder. You will see some kind of improvement because you matter to them.

If they don’t change and drop you, you didn’t lose anything because continuing to hang around them will just result in becoming sick inside because you are sacrificing yourself.

Don’t be a self sacrifice. Choose yourself and let those into your life who you actually mean something to.

Look at it this way, standing up to them is like a test. Be sure of what your seeing, be assertive, consider that you could have misinterpreted but also know that so many people deny. Don’t be about winning or being right. Be clear in your mind what you want. You want to be treated better so that you can both be happy.

The only exception to being treated badly is if the reward is great.

What I mean is this. I’ve had a couple of friends who in my opinion were cerebral narcissists and they could be mildly abusive from time to time. I put up with it because I gained so much knowledge from them. I knew they were somewhat abusive but it was worth the gains.

I eventually spoke to the two of them about their behavior and one denied it and never changed, the other started to heavily criticize me.

The one thing both of them did was when they saw that I was improving my life because of their teachings their advice turned consistently bad. I had to be astute to catch this.

They never actually cared about me I decided. They were simply showing off how smart they were.

The relationships eventually dissipated.

It’s not wrong to choose yourself. Look for people who are truly in your corner, who are consistent, respectful, and who will show up in your life.

Don’t ask yourself whether you are good enough for them, ask whether they are good enough for you.

Shop for your friends rather than selling yourself to them.

Keep your power rather than giving it away! ❤️

5 thoughts on “Self Respect Is About Standing Up For Yourself

  1. We have to get our legs about ourselves. It took me a long time in my past marraige and I now see hwo wrong it was from the start.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I appreciate your support Melinda ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  2. You absolutely deserve to be treated well. 💖

    Liked by 1 person

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